Bacchanalia Magazine

by Reb Jordin

Katie Alice, a Leeds based indie singer songwriter, recently released her fourth single ‘I’m Not A Child Anymore’ on May 1st only a month after the release of her last single ‘Did You Realise’. ‘I’m Not A Child Anymore’ is a song carefully crafted for listeners who crave the bittersweet feeling of being excited about the independence that surrounds adulthood but are still full of longing for a simpler time.

The single opens with Katie’s beautifully controlled vocals accompanied by the delicate strum of a guitar which lends the beginning of the song a calming tone reminiscent of the peaceful nature of the lullabies which serenaded us to the safety of our dreamlands in our childhood. The first verse is home to standout lyrics, ‘it’s a looming feeling sitting in the corner staring at me’ which convey the realisation that you are now an adult so you can’t hide from scary responsibilities anymore.

The song bursts open in the chorus with angelic harmonies and playful strings which only amplify the image of the passing of the baton from girlhood to womanhood. The lyrics, ‘distance grows between us’ present a relatable feeling that listeners can’t help but resonate with as this moment paints the picture of not being able to recognise the child in your old family photos as the world has since corrupted your innocence and tainted your view of life, so you are forever changed.

Katie begins the second verse in a slow dance of tranquillity as the music returns to its
previously stripped back form. The lyrics, ‘I’ve got my own mind now I don’t rely on yours that ship has sailed and I waved goodbye. The guilt trickled in I tried not to cry’ spin the tale of the guilt that comes with growing up. Throughout our young lives we romanticise adulthood and independence but we never stop to realise that those around us are ageing too and the years that we get to be dependent and close to the ones we love are extremely precious. As soon as we reach maturity, we often wish we could return to the safe innocence of our childhood even though it is amazing to be your own person for the first time.

Soon we are blessed with the chorus once again as Katie serenades listeners with the lyrics, ‘although my heart stays the same I’m not a child anymore.’ This moment represents how you’ve always been the same person but now you’re grown you have to stand up for yourself in the face of the world’s horrors. The single ends in a cacophony of siren-like vocals accompanied by a distant drum and a kaleidoscope of all consuming strings leaving the song on an extremely gut-wrenchingly powerful note.

‘I’m Not A Child Anymore’ is for the people who seek academic validation and used big
words as a child to appear more mature but now look back and wish they could feel the freedom of just being a kid again. For the people who pretended they were too cool for daisy chains and Disney movies so pushed their parents away but now regret not letting them support them more in their childhood deeply as they crave that safety now. For the eldest siblings who grew up too fast because they thought they needed too.

So go and give ‘I’m Not A Child Anymore’ a listen and bask in the bittersweet nostalgia is shines a light on and reflect on the reality of adulthood. Also be sure to check out Katie’s other singles in the run up to the release of her debut EP ‘As We Drift’ which will grace your ears on June 13th and catch her at her live shows for the full euphoric experience.